I had to report to the hospital at the g-d-awful hour of 6:00 am this morning for my scheduled hysteroscopy with Dr. Expert.
Well, there were no polyps, no scar tissue, and no fibroids other than the two we knew about which aren't a problem (they are in the wall of the uterus and don't protrude into the uterine cavity).
But....and you gotta hate the but......there was something that he referred to as "abnormal" and "shouldn't have been there", but also said "could be nothing". Great. It was in my endometrial lining at the back of my uterus (where, interestingly, he said that 2/3 of all embryos implant, so, getting rid of it was a good thing). He removed it, sent it off to pathology, and we'll have the results next Thursday. He used the words "we need to make sure it's benign" which, of course, is a scary statement. But, I'm not going to freak myself out until I know more. I googled some things (he mentioned endometritis and we'd have to deal with it if that's what it is...) and then I stopped.
Dr. Expert acted as if he wasn't too concerned. I don't know if he was just trying to keep me calm, but, just this once, I'm going to accept what's been told to me, play dumb, and not research until my fingers cramp and smoke comes out of my computer. We'll deal with whatever it is when we know more.
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I've come to the realization that having faith means you have to accept that you may never know "why" things happen. Well, it ain't easy! So, my hope is that writing about my feelings will help me make as much sense of life as I can!
About Me
- Lisa
- New Jersey
- Hi, thanks for visiting! I'm very open about my long struggle with infertility. My theory is that, by putting yourself out there, you can help others and learn from anyone willing to open up to you! So, feel free to ask me anything you want and tell me about your experiences!
Hey, I'd like to follow along!
Infertility History
- Here's a high-level account of our cycle history. I can elaborate on any of these steps if anyone has any questions (i.e., over-supressing due to drug mistake, my acupuncture experience, the process of getting on the egg donor list, etc...)
- May '06 - First met with RE
- August '06 - IVF #1, antagon protocol, PREGNANT, ectopic resolved with methotrexate
- October '06 - IVF #2, microflare protocol, medication error, over-supressed, converted to IUI #1, negative, diagnosed with Ovarian Reserve Issues
- January '07 - started acupuncture, body stopped ovulating for 2.5 months
- March '07 - IVF #3, microflare protocol, cancelled due to lack of production, stopped acupuncture
- April '07 - Went for second opinion. Doctor concurred with diagnosis and treatment recommendations of first clinic
- May '07 - Passed donor prep cycle, put our names on the egg donor list (matched twice during IVF #4 but we declined since we got pregnant)
- August '07 - IUI #2 (not enough eggs to do IVF), straight Follistim, negative
- September/October '07 - IVF #4, straight Follistim, PREGNANT, m/c at 7 weeks, D&C
- Feb' 08 - IVF #5, straight Follistim, negative
- May '08 - Met with a new RE and put a gameplan in place to do IVF #6 in August!
- August '08 - IVF #6, Estrogen Priming protocol, only produced 1 follicle, converted to IUI #3, negative
- October '08 - IVF #7, co-flare protocol, negative
- January '09 - phone consultation with THE expert. He validated that we'd done every protocol and technique and should move on to donor egg
- February '09 - matched and accepted egg donor. Preparing for DE IVF...
- March '09 - DE cycle, 23 eggs retrieved, 3 embryos transferred, 1 frozen
- April '09 - pregnant! 2 sacs seen, but, only one developed
- December '09 - our beautiful daughter was born, making us a family of three!
- And, just to complete the picture, some of the other things that happened during our IF struggle
9 comments:
Lisa - I know it is hard not to research and over analyze things, but in this case, it really is just best to wait for the official word. I am sure next Thurs feels like forever...hang in there! I will be thinking of you!
I am glad your procedure went well. Waiting on results can be annoying. In my experience, surgeons generally know what cancer looks like. (I work with them every dat.) If your surgeon was really concerned about it, he would have done more than send it for routine processing. Everyone's anatomy is different, and sometimes even MDs get surprised. The pathology will tell you more about what it is. Pathologists deal with more than just cancer.
Try not to worry, and try to have patience.
Sending hugs your way!
Lisa, thanks for coming to my blog. Waiting for the results of your surgery is hard, but regardless, you are on the right track. I'll be reading your story and hope IVF #6 is soon, and easy, and successful. I understand your differences between hope and expectation, and I'll have hope for you.
Try not to worry (easier said than done for sure)
Hopefully it is nothing, and the removal of it will be the fix you need!
I'll be thinking about you.
xoxo
I agree with you about googling. I think we know just too much some times and I know for me I tend to over-think things.
I am sure everything will turn out OK {{vibes}} for a quick (good) answer
Hoping that it really is nothing...and try not to research it - I know I can go crazy over-googling symptoms.
Glad the procedure went ok and I think you are right not to over analyse things until you hear from the doc. I am terrible at conjuring up the worst possible scenario and scaring myself for no reason.
Hope you can keep away from the keyboard keys!
Hi Lisa-I hope you are feeling better. Good luck!!!
So sorry to hear about this unexpected outcome to the surgery. I really hope that whatever they found turns out to be nothing serious. Am thinking of you as you await your results.
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