Estrogen Priming Protocol. This is the protocol that was designed for people with low ovarian reserve. This was supposed to work. I honestly wasn't looking for a miracle and would have been happy to just get to 4 eggs, like my best cycle. I just wasn't, in any way, prepared for this to be my worst response out of the 7 injectable cycles I've done!
The doctor who did today's ultrasound, whom I never met before today (that's what happens when you change clinics) said "so, you have 1 nice follicle. Have you thought about moving forward with IVF with the 1 follicle?" Seriously, I had to restrain myself from standing up in the stirrups (in order to tower over him, because that's how I pictured it in my mind) and shouting "Are you effing kidding me?! Have you seen my history??". Instead, I said something way tamer than that, while sitting there, half naked, holding back the tears. His response, in a way-too chipper voice for someone delivering news to a woman about to add another failed cycle badge to her sash, "Oh, yeah, I see in the records that you have 5 failed IVF's. Talk to your doctor later today but I think we should move on and do the IUI. After all, it only takes one!". Really? REALLY? It only takes one???? Huh, I never heard that one before! (note my sarcasm....)
I have 1 follicle. I could have saved thousands of dollars and countless needle holes in my body and still produced 1 follicle. But, tonight, we stuck one more needle, in my butt, to trigger ovulation of my 1 lone follicle and we'll do an IUI on Friday. The odds of that working are so very low, but, maybe this long stim produced a good egg and, well, there's really no harm in doing an IUI.
I have no words to explain how I'm feeling right now and, at the same time, I have a million things I could say. Nothing in between. And, I don't think I have the strength to start the million, so, I'll stick with nothing...for now....